Tradition is a mainstay of the holiday season. It doesn’t matter so much what the tradition is, but that we have them. And yet, if rules are made to be broken, perhaps traditions are begun so they can change and evolve as we do. Allowing them to reflect our authenticity is key.
Years ago, I began to dread the holiday season because gift giving was no longer fun. I wanted to get away from the materialistic commercialism and do more to help those in need. So in December 2000, I made a change and started a new tradition. I wrote this letter to my family:
“Now that we’re past Thanksgiving, we need to talk about Christmas. Specifically – gifts. I’ll get right to the point. Here’s my list: peace, love, joy, hope, health, freedom from cold and hunger, freedom from fear, the basic essentials for living (food, clothing, shelter)…for everyone!”
I went on to request that, instead of giving me a gift in the traditional sense, they search their community, find where there is a need, and do something to help meet that need. Then I asked that they write about what they did and wrap that as my gift, and I did the same for them.
I was surprised at how much those notes and letters have meant to me. Each year I have been deeply moved with feelings of joy and peace, knowing that my one small request has helped so many others. We became more conscious of the many opportunities we have to help, no matter how large or small. As the years went by, more and more family members joined in my request until now we’ve nearly dispensed with gifts altogether. Instead, we pool our monetary donations and present them to a chosen charity as a unified family gift. Just as importantly, we’ve decided that being together is the best gift we can give each other, so we make the effort every year to travel across the country so we can celebrate being a family, as a family.
I urge you to take a look at your traditions, decide if they truly enhance your holiday celebrations, and change them if they don’t. Making that decision comes naturally when you are connected with your authentic self. That may sound daunting, but getting there can be as easy as holding your little finger. Just gently wrap the fingers of one hand around the little finger of your other hand, and hold it as long as you like, whenever you can. Notice how you begin to feel differently as you connect with your true self, allowing you to speak and act authentically.
May you enjoy an authentic holiday season and celebrate traditions that that bring you joy and peace.