The Shoulds in our Shoulders
“I should do something, should say this, should volunteer for that. I should. I should. I should."
Sound familiar? For some of us, it almost becomes a mantra, but one that leaves us depleted, drained and exhausted rather than motivated, exhilarated and fulfilled. It’s kind of like the little engine that could, but, instead of “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can” as we positively chug bit by bit up a steep hill, we trudge with heavy feet under the weight of “I should, I should, I should.”
That’s not to say that activities on our “should” list are not worthy of our attention, but when they feel they are an obligation rather than a joyful desire, they become a burden and it can feel like we have the weight of the world on our shoulders.
There is good reason for that, because that is exactly where we energetically carry our “shoulds” – on our shoulders. More precisely, we collect and store them in the area around the first thoracic vertebrae (T1), where our neck meets our shoulders.
The study of Jin Shin Jyutsu shows us that, in harmony, this area around T1 is like perfectly balanced scales, evenly weighted on each side. It is that part of us that is fully able to trust and be trusted, and is often referred to as the “Hub” because so many energy patterns pass through it. As we pile on excess baggage in the form of our shoulds, the Hub becomes out of balance and every energy pattern crossing through can be affected.
Perhaps you’ve heard of a train yard wheelhouse, a large wheel configuration with a turntable in the center hub for the locomotive, and tracks positioned like wheel spokes leading into and out of the hub. A locomotive would enter the wheelhouse, be positioned on the turntable, and then turned to line up on track in a different direction. You can imagine the bottleneck that could occur if other locomotives or even debris blocked the tracks leading in and out of the wheelhouse. The energy patterns around T1 are similar to this, arriving and leaving in various directions. It is not difficult to see how a disruption in any one pattern could clog up the whole works. Holding onto our shoulds can energetically cause such disruption, resulting in a variety of physical discomforts.
One early signal that we are holding onto our shoulds is the raising or scrunching up of our shoulders. Being aware of this, and consciously dropping our shoulders, can do much to ease their burden.
By releasing the excess baggage of our shoulds, we can transform “I should, I should, I should” into “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can”. And then it’s just a short distance to “I know I can” and “I did it!”
Self-Help Tip: Rest one hand over the opposite shoulder and sit on the other hand. (For instance, cross the left arm across the chest and rest the left hand on the right shoulder, while sitting on the right hand.) Rest in this position for a few minutes (or as long as you like).